I Have News For You

Facebook and I have parted ways. This may turn out to be my life’s crowning achievement. One of the positive results of this: more posts on my blog.

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Photo by Charolette Stoehr

I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU

There are people who do not see a broken playground swing
as a symbol of ruined childhood

and there are people who don’t interpret the behavior
of a fly in a motel room as a mocking representation of their thought
process.

There are people who don’t walk past an empty swimming pool
and think about past pleasures unrecoverable

and then stand there blocking the sidewalk for other pedestrians.
I have read about a town somewhere in California where human beings

do not send their sinuous feeder roots
deep into the potting soil of others’ emotional lives

as if they were greedy six-year-olds
sucking the last half-inch of milkshake up through a noisy straw;

Do you see that creamy, lemon-yellow moon?
There are some people, unlike me and you,

who do not yearn after fame or love or quantities of money as
unattainable as that moon;
thus, they do not later
have to waste more time
defaming the object of their former ardor.

Or consequently run and crucify themselves
in some solitary midnight Starbucks Golgotha.

I have news for you—
there are people who get up in the morning and cross a room

and open a window to let the sweet breeze in
and let it touch them all over their faces and bodies.

by Tony Hoagland

Micro Vision

Paper TowelLivingroom rug

Sometimes I am shut up in my apartment for days on end. I spend hours editing photos, researching scholarships and internships and just taking some down time. If I get the photography itch during these periods, I wander around my apartment taking micro photos of anything and everything. The above is a photo of a paper towel and one of my living room rugs. I always learn so much from these shoots, about my camera settings, about light, about pattern, shape and perspective. Taking the vision down to a micro level also expands my small apartment view and I feel less disconnected from the greater world. I go from being the smallest thing in the here and now to the largest. When I look at the world in micro vision a whole new world of photography opens up and I could literally spend weeks just taking photos in my apartment. Think about it…water drops, rugs, pillows, walls, wood flooring, quilts, paper towel…

Reno Roadtrip

Reno 2014 726

My twenty year old son, mom and I took a road trip to Reno this past weekend to celebrate my mom’s birthday. I did most of the driving and as always I passed photo after photo opportunity. I always notice the most photo ops while I am behind the wheel of the car. You know that perfect light meets matter moment and you catch it as you are whizzing by at 65 miles per hour. Or the tractor is plowing across the field, leaving a cloud of dust behind and the sun is situated at just the right angle…these moments kill me as I fly by…missed shots that I silently mourn as I keep on keeping on. Sometimes I call them out to my son hoping that at least someone can capture them but once called out the moment has passed and the shot isn’t THE ONE. I entertained the idea of having someone drive me around for a “driving photo shoot” just so I could see how many shots I could capture that I feel I miss while driving. The one I am still mourning from our trip to Reno is the “ghost diner” along hwy 39 in Cali. It was complete with old neon sign, frosty cones and whispers of teens gone by pulled up outside.  I may have to drive this route again just to shoot that one.  Happy drive-by shootings!

Taking The Long Way

Knowing something in your head is often so different from KNOWING something.  Confusing, I know.  Let’s try this again. Seeing and recognizing that you have certain knowledge in your memory banks, doesn’t always mean you that you have fully comprehended that knowledge.

I have spent years knowing that it is important to not get stuck in a rut and to change things up to keep from getting stagnate. Somewhere along the way, those things that I chose to do to change things up a bit, became a part of my rut.  I didn’t fully recognize this until I stepped out of my comfort zone and did something uncharacteristic and new.  I talked to people I don’t know, I opened up and was vulnerable to them. I invited criticism from them.  I sat beside some who I know to have had disagreements with me. I just was. I was fully present in every way. I looked them in the eyes and let them see into me. Yeah, I had some moments where I wanted to shut down or put up the walls.  I made a conscious choice not to and instead just examine where that feeling came from and in turn what it was that I was afraid they would see.  That is another blog entry. 😉autumn rust

After I came away from the weekend experience of being open and vulnerable and experiencing the new, I found that I wanted more of that.  I took a good hard look around me and my present lifestyle and realized how much I did rushing head long on a straight line course, just to get it done.   My time was filled up and overflowing with things I loved doing but they had become a chore to be checked off on a list.  A list that was so long that it was ongoing and never  cleared of its tasks. When did this happen? Why did this happen?

I had stopped taking the long way. The scenic route is what gives us pleasure and fulfillment on the road to where we are going. Stopping to smile and talk nonsense to the little five-year old, plastering your bedroom wall with maps of places you dream about, sitting with a friend in her livingroom drinking wine and talking about love, having a giggling fit in the middle of an intimate moment, and just taking the long way home so you can listen to the radio and sing longer.  These are all things that fall away for me when I start taking the short cut home so I can get to my list of things to do.

I still have my list. I am a list person and so that will never go away. I do however have a different perspective on accomplishing that list. The important things to me now exist in between the lines on that list and every time I look at it, I remember those are what keep me happy and fulfilled.

“Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by every moment that takes your breath away.” Anonymous